Dogged Blog

Aching

Since my mom died, I've had constant severe pain. You might wonder why I haven't sought medical care for this problem, and this is why: The pain is never in the same place for more than a few days.

It started in my right calf, a weird pain like a cramp that persisted longer than any subsequent pains -- maybe two or three weeks. It was so bad I limped.

It went away as suddenly as it came, to be replaced by agony in my neck, which went away to be replaced by a shockingly sharp pain in my left toes, which popped up suddenly into my right shoulder, then my left shoulder, then the small of my back, then both my thigh muscles, then my left hip, and now my left knee.

Some of these pains have had minor tweaks or injuries that occurred before the pain, but seriously, I've spent at least half the days since my mom passed away limping or taking ibuprofen or creaking around like an old lady.

I know there is a psychological component to all this aching. I guess I'd been ignoring my body for so long -- hello, sleeplessness, erratic and unhealthy eating, no exercise, getting my body into uncomfortable positions to help support or move my mom at the end -- and probably just detached so utterly from it that my attempts now to re-inhabit the flesh are, well, painful. I mean, I'm not aware of any diseases that involve a pain that jumps all over your body like this -- are you? I'd hate to miss some rare diagnosis that can be cured by drinking more water or whatever.

I also re-gained some weight. Unless you've lost, as I have, nearly 200 pounds, you probably can't understand how depressing it is to put even a small amount of of it back on. In fact, the only thing more depressing than those pounds coming back is the re-appearance of my obsessive focus on my weight and what I'm eating, a crazy state of mind I thought I'd said goodbye to forever years ago.

Fortunately, two good friends pointed out to me that I'd gone batshit insane on the subject of food and weight, and that possibly I might want to consider that it had become the focus of some displaced anxiety, grief and feelings of powerlessness about my mom's illness, suffering and death, and my own loss. (Why yes, I do have very smart friends.) So I've sworn off obsessing on the subject through the end of the year, and even put my scale in the basement until then.

I am, though, trying to make friends with my body again. My new gym has a swimming pool, so I can get some exercise without hurting my shoulder back calf thighs arm hand fingers toes knee [insert current afflicted body part here]. I also have an appointment with a new trainer for Tuesday morning, in the hope of designing a gentle re-conditioning program to work on mobility and limberness. Yoga helped me  a lot with that in the past, but I had a really incredible teacher -- I have my fingers crossed that the yoga instructors at this gym are going to be right for me. They work with all kinds of people, including the seniors and those with disabilities, so I'm hoping this won't be "Yoga for the Beautiful Pretzel People." I've found WAY too many of those classes since moving to San Francisco three years ago.

But no matter how much I try to focus on the moment and myself, the fact is this: I really screwed myself up caring for my mom. I hurt my heart and my mind and my body. I burned myself out right down to the core of me. I have almost nothing left right now for anyone, including myself. There are days that every single thing I see or hear or touch hurts me, because it makes me think of her and how much I miss her, and what hell her final year was.

This time last year, my mom had just had her lumpectomy. We knew she'd be having her mastectomy in January. We were still happy and excited about Obama's election, and both of us were full of hope for the future.

Right now, all I have the energy to hope for is that I'll wake up tomorrow not feeling like I'm a hundred years old.

Photo: My mom and my beautiful nephew, in happier times.

No-kill leadership awards announced

The No Kill Advocacy Center today announced the winners of its Henry Bergh Leadership Awards for "unwavering commitment to ending the systematic killing of animals in U.S. shelters."



Recipients were:



Bonney Brown (pictured), director of the Nevada Humane Society and part of the team that has given Washoe County, Nevada, one of the highest save rates of any community in the country.



Susanne Kogut, director of the Charlottesville-Albermarle County SPCA, who has led her community to a greater than 90 percent save rate on a county-wide basis for three years running.



Seperate awards to Ryan Clinton, of FixAustin.org, and Clare Davis of Coalition for a No-Kill King County, who are showing that the shelter system can be reformed from the outside by animal lovers in Austin, Texas and King County, Washington, respectively.



Mike Frye and Beth Nelson of Animal Wise Radio, starting what I hope will be a trend in giving prizes to journalists (kidding!) -- a team that has been covering the no-kill movement nationwide for years now, and whose interviews with the leaders of that movement can be found here.



Joan Schaffner of the Animal Law Program at George Washington University Law School and the host of this year's No Kill Conference in Washington, DC.



Henry Bergh was the founder of the ASPCA, the nation's first humane society and the man who started the animal welfare movement.



You can read the PDF file announcing the awards here.



Congratulations, everyone!

Best. Bo. Obama. Vid. Ever.

How the heck did I miss this? Bo Obama giving high five to Oprah and Michelle Obama!

Is my long love affair with Aveda over?

 Aveda skincare products were like a miracle to the stressed-out, ravaged skin of my early 20s. I've been a faithful user since then, and it's consistently been the only skin care line and foundation brand that didn't irritate my rosacea.

Then they discontinued one of the few nighttime moisturizers that I could use, Night Nutrients. Still, I stocked up and soldiered on.

Yesterday, I discovered they've discontinued their liquid foundation. The salesperson at the Aveda store told me they were discontinuing it because "Aveda isn't known for their makeup," and would not be replacing it.

I have no idea what that means, but I'll tell you this: a skincare line without a foundation is only half a skin care line. We all need sun protection and those of us with dry skin and rosacea need to protect our skin from wind and temperature extremes, too. And yeah, I'm not wild about the blotchy redness showing through when it flares up, which it unpredictably does at odd times during the day.

So now I'm back out in the big world, looking for a really soothing, protective liquid moisturizer with sun protection and more-than-sheer coverage. And please, don't talk to me about the mineral powders -- I've tried them, and they make my skin feel like I have a sunburn. Not gonna happen, no matter how great they are for your skin.

Breaking: Christie trains a dog

It's a dog training breakthrough, and I'm so excited I had to share it with everyone!



As I've already confessed, I bought a raincoat for my Borzoi, Kyrie, so that her beautiful glamorous fluffy fur wouldn't get ruined in the rain. I'm shallow that way.



There was only one flaw in this plan. Although Kyrie would wear her raincoat, even model it for photographs, she resolutely refused to take so much as one step outside in it, no matter how hard it was raining. And getting a 70 pound sighthound to move when she has decided to stand is even more difficult than the virtually impossible opposite.



So I was in despair. But then I remembered... clicker training. "I'll bet, " I said to myself, "That I could get her to do this with a clicker."



And I did! I really did! She went on her evening walk tonight in her coat.



The truth is, I'm not much of a dog trainer. My dogs are always well-behaved, in the sense that they don't bark and jump and make nuisances of themselves, and they're housetrained and walk on a loose leash and do what you need to do in the show ring. They're not, you know, feral or anything.



But more formal obedience training? Both my herding mixes were trained like that, but honestly, training sighthounds in formal obedience makes me want to cry and suck my thumb.



But training a sighthound to do one specific behavior, a very easily defined single action, using a clicker?



Even I can do that.

Until forever comes along, foster homes keep pets safe and loved

I admit it; this week's column on SFGate.com is nothing but a shameless plea for pet lovers to considering becoming a fosterer for a homeless pet. It's obvious, of course, what's in it for the pets: We get them out of stressful and over-crowded shelters and into homes. But guess what? There's even more in it for us:

San Francisco resident Sherri Franklin caught the pet fostering bug from a dog named Angel, a chow/golden retriever mix so shy she would cower when she met new people.



"I called her a ghost dog, because she would run through the house and hide under the bed," Franklin said. She and her other dogs gave Angel space and some TLC, and it paid off. "To see her running on the beach and finally come out and doing things like give a little kiss or lean against you -- it was so amazing."



So amazing, in fact, that Franklin went on to foster dozens of dogs after Angel found her permanent home. Eventually she established Muttville, a nonprofit Bay Area rescue group relying entirely on foster homes to house its dogs.



"A lot of people like fostering because, while they want to help animals, they don't want to make a forever commitment," she said. "Maybe they know they'll be moving in the coming year, or maybe they have job obligations that are seasonal and know they can only help out during certain months."



It's also the perfect answer for pet-loving families that are worried about pet food and vet bills.



"Most organizations, including Muttville, cover all expenses for pets in our foster homes," Franklin said. "That way, you don't have to take on an animal without knowing what it might cost in the future."

Read the rest here, and when you're done, check out the dog in the photo, Grandpa, a 12 year old mixed breed currently being fostered by Muttville. I'm in love with his sweet face.

A challenge to a generation

"We have a choice. We can fully, completely, and without reservation embrace No Kill as our future. Or we can continue to legitimize the two-pronged strategy of failure: adopt a few and kill the rest. It is a choice which history has thrown upon us. We are the generation that questioned the killing. We are the generation that has discovered how to stop it. Will we be the generation that does?” -Nathan Winograd

Fantasy ’s best pets, familiars, and animal companions

When you were little, did you imagine having a mysterious animal who would love and protect and understand you? A horse to carry you away from your problems, a dog to guide you through the forest, a cat who was really a familiar?



In the world of fantasy books, films, and television shows, that's very often exactly what animals turn out to be -- magical beings, or at least those with mysterious powers to help and shield us.



Brent Hartinger at TheTorchOnline.com takes a look at some of fantasy's most memorable pets, familiars and animal companions, including one of my favorites, Xena's horse, Argo, from the television series Xena: Warrior Princess:

Xena is no ordinary warrior — so why should she have an ordinary horse? Sure enough, hers is extraordinarily intelligent, sensing danger, responding to a number of different commands, being able to command other horses, and even once enduring having been turned into a miniature version of herself. Speaking of which, is Argo male or female? While referred to as “boy” in earlier seasons, she is eventually identified as female (and was usually portrayed by a mare). The horse died during Xena and Gabrielle’s Ares-induced 25-year sleep in the ice-cave, but gave birth to a daughter, Argo II, who, remarkably, had all of Argo’s abilities.

Incidentally, did you ever wonder why Gabrielle had no horse? According to the producers speaking at a fan convention, it took three horses to make it look like Xena had one horse. For Gabrielle to have had a horse, that would have meant having six horses on hand — something that was financially impossible.

He also takes a look at Scabbers the rat and Hedwig the owl in the Harry Potter series (although of course, I prefer Padfoot the dog, played by a Scottish Deerhound), and a host of others.



Check it out here, and then tell us: Did you have a favorite fantasy character from films, television, or books who isn't mentioned in the article? For me, it was Preciosa the hawk from Marion Zimmer Bradley's young adult novel Hawkmistress.

Dogs -- and women -- live longer with their ovaries than without

There's no arguing with the animal population control benefits of spaying and neutering pet dogs. The health benefits, though, are a somewhat harder case to make. It's not that there are none -- there are. It's that the more research that's done, the more the risks seem to equal or outweigh those benefits.



In addition to the then-comprehensive look at the benefits and risks of surgical sterilization of pet cats and dogs that was published in 2008 in the Journal of the American Veterinary Association, research out of Purdue University is suggesting that female dogs and, interestingly, female humans, live longer if they keep their ovaries:

This year, hundreds of thousands of women and pet dogs will undergo a hysterectomy and have their ovaries removed along with their uterus. Now, two independent research studies looking at longevity may challenge almost four decades of standard operating procedures used in women and in pets.



Research published Tuesday (Dec. 1) shows female dogs that keep their ovaries longer also live longer. The study, exploring the factors that favor successful aging in pet dogs, was conducted by a research team led by David J. Waters, a doctor of veterinary medicine.



Waters' work is the first investigation to look for a link between retaining ovaries and reaching exceptional longevity in mammals. Waters is executive director of the Gerald P. Murphy Cancer Foundation, based at the Purdue Research Park of West Lafayette. The Murphy Foundation is home to the Center for Exceptional Longevity Studies, which tracks the oldest living pet dogs in the United States.

Waters went on to report that the dogs in the study lived 30 percent longer if intact, and that dogs with ovaries until the age of 6 years were four times more likely to have "exceptional longevity" than those female dogs who were spayed the earliest.



It's not just dogs, though:

The pet dog research published in Aging Cell mirrors the findings of the Nurses' Health Study published this summer by Dr. William Parker and colleagues from the John Wayne Cancer Institute in Santa Monica, Calif.



Parker's group studied more than 29,000 women who underwent a hysterectomy for benign uterine disease. The findings showed that the upside of ovary removal - protection against ovarian, uterine and breast cancer - was outweighed by increased mortality from other causes. As a result, longevity was cut short in women who lost their ovaries before the age of 50 compared with those who kept their ovaries for at least 50 years.



[...]



Taken together, the emerging message for dogs and women seems to be that when it comes to longevity, it pays to keep your ovaries.

Read the whole story here.

Are you ready for the dog and cat flu?

Welcome to the world of influenza, a virus with a dazzling ability to mutate, cross species, and in general stay one step ahead of the immune systems of mammals and birds – including human beings and our family pets. From my column today on SFGate.com:

The first cases in pets were reported in ferrets, which are notoriously prone to influenza viruses. But when the American Veterinary Medical Association (AVMA) reported last month that a sick cat in Iowa had the disease, epidemiologists and virologists took notice. It was the first time a cat had become ill from an influenza virus.



Since then, two more sick cats, one of whom died, tested positive for H1N1, and Chinese officials announced Saturday that they had isolated the virus in two sick dogs.



Dr. Tony Johnson, a clinical assistant professor at the Purdue University School of Veterinary Medicine, said that it doesn't look like our pets are a risk to us.



In fact, we're a risk to them -- every cat that's been diagnosed with H1N1 lived with a human who had a respiratory illness shortly before the cat became sick.

H1N1 made history as the first influenza virus to make a cat sick, but the real history was made five years ago, when canine influenza was first identified in racing greyhounds in Florida.

The H1N1 outbreak isn't the first time an influenza virus has adapted to be able to cause illness in a dog, however.That occurred in 2004, when an equine influenza virus, H3N8, was identified as the cause of a deadly outbreak of respiratory disease in racing greyhounds in Florida.



Woody, a flat-coated retriever, is a healthy adult dog today, but when he was just a puppy in Texas, he came down with what his breeder thought was "kennel cough," the dog version of a cold.



But what Woody had was something no one thought to look for, a brand new virus that posed a serious risk to very young, very old and immune-compromised dogs.



"He spent the next month at the vet school at Texas A&M, fighting for his life," said his owner, Gina Spadafori, who lives in Sacramento. "He survived, but he was weak and spent many weeks recuperating after that."



The bug that almost killed Woody was a viral changeling dubbed H3N8. Originally thought only to affect horses, it had adapted itself to be able to cause disease in another species, the dog.



Once researchers started looking for H3N8, they found dogs carrying the virus in 30 states (including California) and the District of Columbia, a wide distribution suggesting it had been spreading without detection for quite some time.

Read the rest here.



Update: H/t to reader Lynn for a correction here.