BlogHer: Sequel to a Prequel, or, No, That's Not It

I've been following Technorati tags (which I learned how to put in a Typepad post at BlogHer, thank you tech goddesses at the Tagging session!) for BlogHer, and noticed a number of attendees have only just today started to write about their impressions of the conference. So I'm not alone in wanting to let things process.

I've seen a few comments suggesting those of us who didn't have the best experience at BlogHer last weekend might have been put off by "cliques." I didn't feel that at all - I didn't notice any cliques and actually thought almost everyone was extraordinarily friendly and personally inclusive.

I've also seen myself quoted in a number of blogs, sometimes with attribution and sometimes not, and sometimes quoted out of context or inaccurately. But that's the risk you take when you open your mouth. Which is, you know, something I do a lot.

I've also seen the "mommybloggers" reacting very hostiley to suggestions that the conference was too mommy-ish. I don't blame them. If lesbians were as much the focus of the conference as mommys were (and yeah, I get there is overlap in the two groups), I'd have loved it and hated anyone saying it made them feel left out.

But I still feel the conference was too mommyish. Culturally it was alienating, for me as a lesbian and for many heterosexual women who aren't mothers or even ARE mothers but aren't interested in "mommyblogging."

And the conference really was too marketing-oriented, but there are a lot of other folks blogging about that, and it's something I'm still mulling over.

The assumption of heterosexuality as the norm was overwhelming. There wasn't even a "Birds of a Feather" sign up sheet for lesbian/bi women. At a WOMEN'S BLOGGING CONFERENCE IN THE SAN FRANCISCO BAY AREA? Huh?

At one session on our identities and if we feel a need to represent and advocate for them as bloggers, not one of the wonderful panelists was a lesbian. I certainly wouldn't want to see fewer women of color up there, but is there some shortage of lesbians of color who blog I'm not aware of?

Didn't think so.

At that same session, if I hadn't spoken about blogging as a lesbian, would it have come up? I don't think so - no one else addressed it afterward, although I did get applause when I finished speaking. And I started out asking if I was the only lesbian in the room, which got a lot of hands in the air. Also a good way to meet women. Which brings me to...

Fluff. This is a topic that came up a lot in the post-mortems. It has to do with women who blog about shoes and hair and makeup, stuff that as you know I'm really into, although I don't actually blog about them all that much. Certainly not at all in proportion to how important they are in my life. And yeah, I saw a lot of really cute shoes at this thing. Bite me.

I was careful when introducing myself to say that my blog is about politics and also about dogs, and also that I edit a music blog and write about TV and movies for AfterEllen.com/AfterElton.com. Because I'm all about owning up to my fluffier side. I even told a few people I blog about Xena: Warrior Princess from time to time. I didn't mention my obsession with Gabrielle's abdominal muscles, though, because I have an image to preserve.

So, no, it wasn't the fluff thing that bothered me.

Some commentaries worth watching:

Goodbye Grassroots BlogHer (sourduck)

It Was Good, It Was Bad, I Made an Ass of Myself (feministe)

Meanwhile I'm still thinking.

Comments

[KT]

I didn't mention my obsession with Gabrielle's abdominal muscles, though, because I have an image to preserve.

Oh so tempting ... no, be nice! ... don't mess with Christie's sense of image. Just walk away ...

... I could so tell stories ;) But I won't. I think.

[Judi]

Hey Christie-

I must have my head in the clouds. I didn't know blogging was so damn popular. Your blog is the only one I read (or look at) at least once a day. I am always looking for those blogs about dogs though. Shit, I didn't even know you were gay until I found your obsession with Xena (and shit, who knew Xena was gay??)

Judi - obsessed with dogs and nothing but.

[Melinda (Sour Duck)]

I didn't attend the "Identity.... and Obligations" panel, opting instead for the "Get Deeply Geeky" Room of Your Own, so I'd be very interested in a post on this, if you have one boiling on the back burner.

As far as the BOF clipboards, I don't think it was clear to those new to BlogHer that they could create a clipboard.

Best,

Melinda

[Elisa Camahort]

Hi there, thanks for your feedback. I do want to point out that we put out mostly *blank* sheets of paper for the birds of a feather organization. The whole point of that session was to be self-organizing and not try to dictate.

I think an emerging theme for at least a panel next year would be Us vs. Them. I think that many different segments of bloggers were represented, and it seems like sometimes it felt like oil and vinegar to people. I do think there is a value to finding common ground, though. There's no sense in ignoring that sometimes groups didn't relate to one another. But could that be discussed productively? And what would the goal of such a discussion be?

I'm not asking you as though it's your job to answer of course, I'm just throwing the questions out to the blogiverse :)

[arse poetica]

Christie, wonderful to meet you, and thanks for all the info about sugar substitutes! =)

Re: BlogHer's being "too mommyish," I've hardly read all (or even 10%) of the posts on this, but I hope folks don't confuse the presence of an enthusiastic and coherent group of women w/ the more frustrating product pitches to same (and the rest of us). In short, mommybloggers rock. Advertising and heteronormativity do not.

I said to Melinda and others that what I wish for BlogHer next year is that a benevolent billionaire will make an anonymous donation so we can be blissfully ad-free.

[Christie Keith]

I didn't attend the "Identity.... and Obligations" panel, opting instead for the "Get Deeply Geeky" Room of Your Own, so I'd be very interested in a post on this, if you have one boiling on the back burner.

I do and I will! I just wanted to let it all settle.

As far as the BOF clipboards, I don't think it was clear to those new to BlogHer that they could create a clipboard.

No, and when I registered, I didn't see any blank clipboards, so it wouldn't have occurred to me.

Thanks for commenting!

[Christie Keith]

Hi there, thanks for your feedback. I do want to point out that we put out mostly *blank* sheets of paper for the birds of a feather organization. The whole point of that session was to be self-organizing and not try to dictate.

Yes, that makes sense - when I picked up my registration, there were no blank clipboards or any way to know that was a possibility.

I think an emerging theme for at least a panel next year would be Us vs. Them. I think that many different segments of bloggers were represented, and it seems like sometimes it felt like oil and vinegar to people. I do think there is a value to finding common ground, though. There's no sense in ignoring that sometimes groups didn't relate to one another. But could that be discussed productively? And what would the goal of such a discussion be?

I have no problem with many groups of women without structured overlapping, nor with attempting to create a panel or event that seeks to create such overlapping - either can be fine. For me, it was more about feeling extremely invisible. Not unwelcome. I didn't feel any hostility, to the contrary, on a personal level, everyone was quite welcoming and inclusive. But from the minute I got there, I kept thinking... I'm not their audience. This isn't about me. Which surprised the hell out of me and wasn't what I expected.

I'm not asking you as though it's your job to answer of course, I'm just throwing the questions out to the blogiverse :)

I'm glad you did, and I'll keep posting my thoughts as they crystallize.

[Christie Keith]

Christie, wonderful to meet you, and thanks for all the info about sugar substitutes! =)

It was great meeting and talking with you, too... in fact, it was something of a high point of the conference for me! Thank you very much for coming by, and I'll keep my fingers crossed for the benevolent billionaire as well.

[Maria Niles]

Hi Christie,

Thank you from the bottom of my heart for standing up and speaking at the Identity and Obligation panel.

Because we could have dozens of "identities" on the panel and because the panel, in part, grew out of the Brown Bloggers session last year, the panelists were primarily clustered around race and you are correct that none identified as lesbian.

We hoped and were thrilled to have the audience expand the discussion beyond race and y'all did so brilliantly. Hopefully the panel will continue to evolve and your comments and observations will help the conversation grow.

And just another quick note on the BOF sign-ups - we started off with ~2/3 of the sheets blank and they quickly filled up. I personally put out some more blank sheets and those immediately filled up. It is great to know, though, that this option was not clear and that is something that can definitely be addressed next year.

Best,
Maria